I've got that antsy feeling that I get, probably, a little too often.
That feeling that I'm not doing what I'm suppose to be doing and I'm not where I'm suppose to be.
It's really a frustrating feeling.
It's that feeling that has kept me from keeping one job for more than one year at a time. Which, by the way, can I say how excited I was when I realized that I only have one W2 to use when I file taxes for 2009 (yes I said "when". I have yet to do our taxes...please refer to all of the other posts where I mention my slacker tendencies if this bit of information was at all shocking to you). I'm almost embarrassed to admit that my record is 5 W2's in a year (in my defense that was back in my college days when I held multiple part time jobs throughout the semesters).
So I'm starting to get that antsy feeling again...maybe because we sold our house, I feel a bit of "what's next" syndrome...or maybe it's the weather.
I'm pretty exhausted. This whole house selling process was pretty draining. It had not quite hit me, until last night, that we no longer owned our house. We moved all of our furniture out of our bedroom and I was a little bit sad. It is all going into storage until we decide where we'll be living next. I stayed up until midnight packing. Now, don't think that I waited until last night to pack! No, for once I did not slack, I have been packing since we first put our house under contract. However, last night was the big bulk of it and I'm such a perfectionist that it tends to take me a longgg time to get things packed and organized just the way I like it.
I do not like this in between stage feeling...it makes me feel like I'm constantly missing something, and that is not referring to actually loosing stuff in the whole packing process (like Ali or the packing tape when "I JUST had it! Where did it go guys??" or Sevs keys, this morning, when he realized he had laid them on the coffee table...the coffee table that is now covered in 3 feet of stuff to be packed and impossible to even get to from all the boxes stacked around it.) No, it makes me feel like I'm missing a part of me, my home, my place of being. I feel upside down and off my normal everyday course.
I'm also exhausted from house hunting. I have come to despise HGTV "house hunters" or "property virgin"...those people just walk right into a place, two...three tops and find the "perfect place! Oh this is exactly what we're looking for!"....it does NOT happen like that in the Mullen household. Nope. We can't find hide nor hair of our perfect home! **sigh**
I'm tired and I'm ready for this stage to be over with.
Oh look the suns out!! I hope my mood changes :) Have a lovely weekend ya'll and if you feel like packing, head my way! I have a few boxes and some packing tape (somewhere, I'll find it!) that has your name allllll over it ;)
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3 comments:
You feel like that because you are a planner (like your Dad) and you want to have everything planned and scheduled out. It will get better, just say a prayer and relax. Come home and see Henrybebe. P & H are so cute together.
Love you girl,
JM
I would def. be antsy if I didn't have a permanent place to reside. I'd be nervous. Us women are like that. We can't turn our brains off when something big is on it. Men can forget it for a while, when they are busy or having fun but us, nope, we hash it out, think about it, worry about it, etc. I feel you. don't worry, you'll figure it all out soon enough.
I agree with all of the above, but I have another thing to add.
Your perfect home may not exist in the location and price range you want. It may not exist at all! But what does exist is the place God wants you to dwell. And he will lead you to it, in his time. I know you know that; just keep believing!
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